Is Something Holding You Back? Four Steps to Overcome It

In “What’s Holding You Back from Love, Passion and Connection?” Susie and Otto Collins, married relationship coaches, share their discovery of “the theory of constraints” which they found out about from — of all places — a business conference. They said that when you can’t get what you want out of your relationship, something is holding you back that needs to be discovered and eliminated. This, in turn, brings you closer to what you want! Sounds great! Their four steps include:

1. identify what you want (from your relationship, or what kind of relationship you want if you aren’t in one)
2. figure out deep down what it is that is holding you back from it
3. don’t judge it or yourself
4. just listen

What’s nice about the Collins’ post is that they share some easy to digest solution ideas by painting pictures of some examples of what we might be going through and how to take baby steps to improve our situation. Check out their entire post at susieandotto.com.

Top 10 Maintenance Tips

Another married team, Sally Connelly and John Turner–who are both family therapists–offer up their “Top Ten Marriage Maintenance Tips” on their blog. Even if you think you are doing okay in your love-union, it’s always good to check up on ways to keep it that way just in case there is something else wonderful you can share in your experience with your partner. Topping their list at number 1 is to have ongoing State of the Marriage or State of the Relationship discussions! Connelly and Turner explain: Talk about what you both agree is good in your relationship so that you may continue with that; but also, talk about hopes and dreams as well as needs you have that might improve your relationship. Guess what number 8 is? DATE NIGHT! Number 8 on the list urges you to have a date night with your partner once a week, EVERY week, even if it’s done without leaving your pad. Go to relationshipdilemmas.blogspot.com.

Do You have Toxic In-laws?

I could not help but notice that the Connelly and Turner team have also posted a great piece on how to handle “toxic in-laws.” Their advice is brief but quite good, including encouraging us to set realistic expectations while trying to understand the in-laws’ side of things. They also suggest what to talk about and what not to talk about with them! Read Connelly and Turner’s complete post for the entire lowdown of advice, which closes by suggesting to not completely sever contact with your in-laws unless they are truly being abusive toward you. See relationshipdilemmas.blogspot.com.