Thou Shalt Not Resent Your Lover…

Leo at ZenHabits shares that his second marriage is benefiting from lessons learned from mistakes made during his first marriage. Gleaning from that he has put together a thoughtful list entitled, The Seven Deadly Sins of a Relationship. After pointing out what he feels should be done in order to feed a happy relationship, he goes into the Deadly Sins that should be avoided, beginning with Resentment. Leo says since it is a poison which can grow to mythic proportions, you absolutely need to sever it early on. His solutions include, breathing and let it go while accepting your loved one, imperfections and all. If you really can’t let it go, communicate with your loved one -– preferably in a gentle, non-confrontational manner and negotiate a solution with them that works for, not just one, but for both of you. Have the courage to talk with your loved one about problems before allowing them to blow up into much bigger ones. All the things on Leo’s list have the potential to bust up your relationship, so communication is definitely key. His complete list of do’s and don’ts can be found at www.zenhabits.net.

Cultivating Self Awareness Results in the Betterment of your Relationships

In Building Healthy Boundaries: How to Create Healthy, Lasting Fulfilling Relationships, Dr. DeFoore imparts in his post that you are responsible for what you bring to your relationship. In order to improve (or in some cases, perhaps salvage) your relationship, you need to think about how you think. You need to step outside of yourself and realize that “your way” may not be the best way. Your way could be simply what you unconsciously learned from your family and other influences. But it pays off to be more introspective and challenge your automatic responses. For more, including exercises that can help you take control of and get clarity on the roles you play in your primary relationship, read the entire article at www.iblogarea.com.

I’d like to leave you with this quote Leo included on his Deadly Sins post:

“Remember, we all stumble, every one of us. That’s why it’s a comfort to go hand in hand.”
- Emily Kimbrough

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