by Christopher Van Buren
Life is usually bigger than we think it is and it can usually be better than we think too. Trouble is, we have the power to make it very small by making our experiences and perceptions small. In other words, life is only as big as we allow it to be for us. What do I mean by that? Well, one common way we shrink life is by limiting ourselves to the choices we can imagine. We keep our choices and our experiences limited by only allowing for what we think is possible. I’m not talking about brainstorming about new possibilities…I’m talking about trusting that life is trying to present you with something more than what you have in mind. When we allow for the “unknown” or the “mystery” to be a part of our lives, then we suddenly make life a lot bigger.

Let me give you a very simple example that happened to me the other day. I went to a nearby shopping mall to look for clothes for my wife on our up-coming anniversary. The mall was extremely crowded that day and parking was impossible. At one point, after driving up and down the multi-story parking structure, I was idling behind a car that had stopped to wait for a space that was about to open up. Behind me, another car was waiting.

Suddenly, not one but two cars began to back out of spaces in front of us, which meant I would get one of the spaces, along with the car in front of me. “Finally,” I thought. But just then, a man got out of the car behind me, walked over to one of the spaces and stood in it. He was holding the space for his group’s car, which was behind me — essentially, robbing me of my space. I told him, “hey, man, we’ve all been driving around here for hours…not just you!” to which he replied “I’m taking this space…do what you have to do.”

When the wave of rage and violence washed over me and past me, I thought, “What the heck…I don’t need to go here today anyway. I’ll take this as a sign that I’m not supposed to shop here,” and I proceeded to leave the lot. Making my way back in the direction of home, I came across another shopping mall and it seemed a lot bigger and less crowded than the first one, so I took a chance and entered the lot. I found a parking space right in front of the entrance, walked directly into a store that had exactly what I was looking for, and received excellent service the respect I deserved.

The moral for me? I don’t need to fight my experience or force my way through life. Life is always ready to offer me more choices and if I’m experiencing something unpleasant, those choices are most likely a lot better than what I’m experiencing. It’s not about blind faith or positive thinking…it’s just about knowing that life gives us more options than we can imagine…in every moment. Just move with the flow of life and watch what happens. It’s usually bigger and better than we think.